I ran into a friend recently – a local Jersey guy who has done incredibly well. In the seemingly short time since I last saw him, he’s built a tech business that now employs 100 staff and turns over tens of millions of pounds a year. In Jersey business terms, he’s done incredibly well, a poster child for success, and he’s still in his early thirties.
He shared with me his vision and the plans he has for the business and the potential exit that could see him join the ranks of those that can afford just about any house, including this one, Colline de Lavande. This is a BIG house, but he’s a big guy, so the scale would suit. In my mind, I’d love to think a house like this could be one for someone like him, a dream house for a local boy done good.
An FOI request submitted this year asked about income bands for Jersey residents. The response showed that in 2022 there are only 20 single people and 80 couples that earn over £500,000 per year in Jersey. Even with a six-times earnings multiple, the threshold for property value for people hitting this band of earnings is £3m. If you wanted to make a cheeky offer on Colline de Lavande, you’d need to be 10x-ing that level of earning. So, bottom line, if you like the look of this amazing house… start saving!
The more realistic scenario is that this is snapped up by someone who is relocating to Jersey and bringing their wealth with them, having made some big bucks in the big wide world. The island is full of people who love to hate those that choose to come and make Jersey their home. I’m not one of them. Sure, they sometimes pay tradespeople over the odds and drive up the prices for those of us that want some help with carpentry, but they’re great for the economy, and, ultimately, we need more people like that to make the island work. If any of us had had the sort of success that would allow us to be a HNWI (High Net Worth Individual) on the HVR (High Value Resident) programme, then surely a home like Colline de Lavande would be about the best you could find in Jersey.
People buying a home at this level are looking for more than that elusive extra spare room a lot of us need. There’s a list – a long list of extras at this level – and Colline de Lavande is a property that ensures everything is easily ticked off. Sure, there are five bedroom suites, with the master benefiting from his-and-hers walk-in wardrobes, two bathrooms, a kitchen, a snug/study, and two terraces. And that’s just the master. The floor that houses just the master suite and one outer bedroom is almost 3000 sq ft. There are three more bedrooms, all with en-suites and all with access to the sort of views that can only be enjoyed by a property perched in a perfect position above St. Brelade’s Bay.
The whole property is designed to maximise the enjoyment of this incredible location. While cosily nested amongst the trees, the whole house enjoys the panoramic views toward the coast from inside and out. The large kitchen diner, numerous seating areas, and the pool all access out onto expansive terracing with enough seating areas that filming the sort of open house they have in selling sunset wouldn’t be a problem. The outdoor entertainment spaces total 4000 sq ft. Fancy seeing the view from a pool? OK. How about for the kids play area? Check. What about the putting green? Yes, no problem.
The ground floor ups the ante, with another 4000 square feet of living space, a bedroom suite, and a staff room with prep kitchen. The ‘family’ room features not only a separete space to relax, away from the large lounge across the hall, but also a rotunda of curved glass and a James Bond lair circular sofa to add a third area in which to lounge.
If all that lounging gets too much, you can go all Aerosmith and live it up while you’re going down. Well, after you’ve done down at least, with the lower ground floor offering up not just two more bedroom suites but also a dedicated office (that could be converted into a separate annex) and an adult play area. By that, we’re talking a full bar/’club room’, a cinema, and a gym, complete with massage facilities. You can access a terrace down here too, with a sunroom that offers the final decent to the pool level. As I said previously, there’s not much left to put on that ticklist.
Colline de Lavande is not so much a house as a private luxury hotel. No matter where you’ve found success in the world, it’s amazing to think that Jersey can offer the sort of living environment that warrants building a house of this nature. Sure, the stamp duty bill (£3.6m) is more than the cost of most houses the rest of us will never afford, but that’s a lot of money getting put back into the public purse for other services. So welcome to Jersey; thanks for coming. And if you’re a local in a market for a house like this. Well, go you.
